Diz Amerika sef
By: Babawilly
- We created a profitable Slave trade business and they stole the bad idea making a killing in the process (excuse di pun jare).
- Elvis stole Black grooves and they called him the 'Oba'.
- We invented tribal marks and they started doing tatoos.
- We invented 'Jigida for waist' and native make-up only for them to steal the idea and give us Mary K and ankle chains.
- Man mi (and gals mi) in the olden days men came back from war with the skull of their enemies to shack Tombo. Hitler stole the idea and created gas chambers.
Omo, no look mi laik dat jo. OK, Hitler wasn't Amerikan, sha give mi a break.
- We had Amebo in the popular soap 'The Village Headmaster'. She listens with a sympathetic ear to peoples' problems and even throws in a bit of counselling here and there.
Next minute she is broadcasting your secrets to the whole world hence her nickname -radio oja. The Amerikans gave us Oprah.
- Street fight nko? Before a single punch is thrown we go yab and threaten sotey crowd go gather. The 'two fighting' would be saying things like;
- do you know who I am?
- dem don cook mi o!
- you dey chop bottle?
- dem no born you well!
- If ya name na monkey slap mi make I see now.
- I go baet you eh, you go see malu dey come for road you go jump on top think say na okada.
- I go beat you sotey you go see Amala call am eba.
On and on and on. WWF have stolen this important part of Naija fight culture.
(Reference : Shakara o lo je by Fela)
- Lagos party na road block and spraying cash. Now all the hip-hop videos na road block and throwing Dollars nyanfu-nyanfu at the camera.
- Talk about stating the obvious; Sunny sing say Sunny ti de, o ti de se...(Meaning Sunny don arrive).
Tell mi, why should a man standing in front of you with a microphone have to tell you his name and that he is there. Haba, does he think you paid the gate fee not knowing who the star performer is? Alas even this silly idea has been stolen.
First na;
- 'Hammer time' then
- 'my name is Prince' plus
- 'my name is Snoop...'
- Even dat white boy in white singlet tells us say..my name is..my name is..my name is....
Talk about an identity crisis! Shoo! Oghene Bico! (God Abeg o).
- Naija witches have been boasting of holding their weekly meetings on the moon since 'time Imo river'. Small time Amerikans dem enta Lunar Okada come put USA flag upon Naija Lunar soil. One small step ko, one small bet ni.
- We fought a civil war and they copied us. Ehen what? Abeg gi mi anoda break jo.
- Number twelve!. Na wa! I never thought I will see the day. Is 'June 12' tactics not the preserve of Naija? Wo, no matter what they take from us they can't steal our copyright of 'June 12'. Therefore I intend to sue the state of Florida for infringement of copyright.
Four hundred lawyers are on Naija airways bound for Akata as I speak. (Some no wan go back but don't tell anibodi o). We shall fight to the bitter end. We must serve Naija wit all owa strenght, defend her copyright and uphold her honour and glory.
God bless Naija.
Dis Amerika sef.
Na wa!
© 2000 - Babawilly
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