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Mi Barber

By: Babawilly

Mi Barber from Jamaica
And I from Nigeria
Mi fine hair's from mother
Mi big heads from father

He got a funky towel
Full of tousan bit ah hair
He wraps it round mi neck so
Me itch so much mi fear

Eight month gone past so
Me meet five yout waitin'
He trim up twelve yout hair
And cut mi the thirteenth

Why do this mi barber
No vex, you're now due
Di seven yout go fi toilet
But dem all come before you

He grabs mi head roughly
Nearly mash up mi ear
Wid his humming uneven clippers
I find hard to bear

Mi barber stands too close
So I move away mi elbows
His after shave's a killer
And im Polo horse a two legged runner.

Is dat ganja I smell
It's bad for mi picknee (son)
Mi barber come whispher
Kaint talk, Ganja man's mi boss.

The music is loud
Riddim straight from di Islands
So mi hair cut takes too long
Cos mi barber kaint stop dancin'

He wears a leather medallion
Of sweet Ol' Africa
So I chat 'bout Serria Leone
But he asks 'which Island is dat?'

Mi barber's a politician
Marriage counsellor, comedian
The test cricket selector
And football coach impersonator.

His mobile phone rings
Who dat? he jus' holler
Then walks off and leaves me
Staring at the mirror.

Delilah give ah hair cut
And drain Samson's power
Mi barber give ah hair cut
All mi patience turn sour

Just why do I come here
To dole out mi money
You see, the nice white man's salon
Kaint cut Black man hair nice.

At the end of mi hair cut
He holds a mirror to mi back head
Then sprays mi with something
Makes all the cuts dem sting

Mi barber looks Igbo
And talks like Calabar
He thinks he's from Kingston
But I know he's from Aba.


© 2000 - Babawilly

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