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The Clique Thing
Love Wars
By: Eko Sista (Lagos)
January 27, 2001

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Why do most men allow their friends to take control of their relationships and in many cases, destroy it? Haba!

Have you ever had a boyfriend who was so into his friends that he never had enough time for you? If you answered no, my sister, you are lucky!!

I used to see this guy who was so into his friends that I had to break up with him. No Lie! In hindsight, I regret ever going out with him.

Can you imagine, this bobo would travel for two weeks and when he returns, instead of spending time with me, he rushes out to see his friends. Because according to him, they have come a long way, and they are a clique of friends.

Nonsense! What is so special about this clique thing? What are women getting into by going out with a guy who is in a clique or who has a clique of friends?

During the latest Eko Sista survey I took, many ladies I talked to were hundred percent against it.

According to most of them, when a man is in a clique your relationship is completely under the cliques control. If they don't like you, your boyfriend automatically looses interest in you. They pretty much dictate which way, the relationship goes.

They come to the house when they like without consideration for you and your boyfriends privacy. They even want to know how much your boyfriend gives you.

If they see you anywhere, they tell your boyfriend without any understanding of what you were doing. Many times, these "reports" end up breaking up the relationship.

If you are a woman who wants to spend time with your guy, I beg make you fashie {forget} the one who is part of a clique. He will spend most of his time with his friends

To the men, you need to take control of your life. Your friends can not dictate and should not influence who you chose to spend your time with.

Finally, we ladies should also spend some time really getting to know our man to see if he is strong-willed. And more importantly, what he expects out of the relationship.

That way, we will not have to put all the blame on his friends if the relationship does not work out. {yes, we do that!}

See you soon ojare. Betta dey for okro soup!

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